Autobiographies

I'm writing an unauthorized autobiography.

To write one's memoirs is to speak ill of everybody except oneself.

Of all forms of fiction autobiography is the most *gratuitous.*hilarious.*boring.*

Writing your autobiography is a bit like peeling an onion: there are many layers and you're likely to shed a tear or two along the way.

I'm writing my autobiography for people who have always wondered what it's like to be an unknown, struggling author.

The key to writing a good autobiography is to have *a terrible memory.*a lot of whiskey.*someone else write it.*

The hardest part of writing your autobiography is figuring out which embarrassing stories to leave out.

I tried to write my autobiography, but I kept falling asleep during the boring parts.

My autobiography is going to be titled 'I'm Not Dead Yet: The Early Years'.

I'm writing my autobiography in *pencil*the bath*disguise*...in case I need to make any revisions.

The best way to ensure that your autobiography is a bestseller is to become famous first.

I don't have enough material for an autobiography, but I do have plenty of awkward moments for a cringe-worthy memoir.

An autobiography is an obituary in serial form with the last instalment missing.

Autobiography is now as common as *adultery*muck*fiction* and hardly less reprehensible.

Autobiography – that unrivalled vehicle for telling the truth about other people.

Next to the writer of real estate advertisements, the autobiographer is the most suspect of prose artists.

Every autobiography becomes an absorbing work of fiction, with something of the charm of a cryptogram.

Only when one has lost all *curiosity about the future*their money*sense of hope* has one reached the age to write an autobiography.

Reformers are always finally neglected, while the memoirs of the frivolous will always eagerly be read.