Education

"I have never let my schooling interfere with my education." Mark Twain (American writer, 1835-1910)

"Education is what remains after one has forgotten what one has learned in school." Albert Einstein (German-born theoretical physicist, 1879-1955)

I was reading the dictionary. I thought it was a poem about *everything.*words.*life.* Steven Wright (American comedian, 1955-)

"I was thrown out of college for cheating on the metaphysics exam. I looked into the soul of the boy sitting next to me." Woody Allen (director and actor, 1935-)

"I'm not a teacher: only a fellow-traveller of whom you asked the way. I pointed ahead – ahead of myself as well as you." George Bernard Shaw (Irish dramatist, 1856-1950)

I have never in my life learned anything from any man *who agreed with me.*in a hat.*who shouted at me.* Dudley Field Malone (American politician, 1882-1950)

"The difference between genius and stupidity is that genius has its limits." Albert Einstein (German-born theoretical physicist, 1879-1955)

"The whole purpose of education is to turn mirrors into windows." Sydney J. Harris (American journalist, 1917-1986)

"If at first you don't succeed, redefine success." Anon

"The trouble with the world is that the stupid are cocksure and the intelligent are full of doubt." Bertrand Russell (British philosopher and mathematician, 1872-1970)

I go to school, but I never learn *what I want to know.*life's lessons.*about Daleks.* Bill Watterson (American cartoonist, 1958-)

"I have never met a man so ignorant that I couldn't learn something from him." Galileo Galilei (Italian astronomer, 1564-1642)

"The only thing that interferes with my learning is my education." Albert Einstein (German-born theoretical physicist, 1879-1955)

"If you think education is expensive, try ignorance." Derek Bok (President of Harvard University, 1930-)

"A mind is a terrible thing to waste, but a waist is a terrible thing to mind." Anon

The only thing that saves us from the bureaucracy is its *inefficiency.*spelling.*meaning.* Eugene McCarthy (American Democratic politician, 1916-2005)

I'm not a teacher, but *an awakener.*a ghost.*a sex pest.* Robert Frost (American poet, 1874-1963)

"The important thing is not to stop questioning. Curiosity has its own reason for existing." Albert Einstein (German-born theoretical physicist, 1879-1955)

I am returning this otherwise good typing paper to you because someone has printed gibberish all over it and put your name at the top. An unnamed Professor of English (Ohio University)

"I won't say ours was a tough school, but we had our own coroner. We used to write essays like: What I'm going to be if I grow up." Lenny Bruce (American comedian, 1925-66)

Stand firm in your refusal to remain conscious during algebra. In real life, I assure you, there is no such thing as *algebra.*x.*a free lunch.* Fran Lebowitz (American writer, 1946-)

"Seriousness is stupidity sent to college." P. J. O'Rourke American humorist (1947-)

"The schoolteacher is certainly underpaid as a childminder, but ludicrously overpaid as an educator." John Osborne (English dramatist, 1929-94)

Me havin' no education, I had to use my *brains.*fists.*footballing skills.* Bill Shankly (Scottish footballer and football manager, 1913-81)

"He who can, does. He who cannot, teaches." George Bernard Shaw (Irish dramatist, 1856-1950)

"Soap and education are not as sudden as a massacre, but they are more deadly in the long run." Mark Twain (American writer, 1835-1910)

"In England, at any rate, education produces no effect whatsoever. If it did, it would prove a serious danger to the upper classes, and probably lead to acts of violence in Grosvenor Square." Oscar Wilde (Irish dramatist and poet, 1854-1900)