funny quotation logo



Quotations about Food


Food, a fundamental aspect of our existence, transcends the realm of mere sustenance. It holds the power to ignite our senses, evoke cherished memories, and forge deep connections. Within the realm of gastronomy, a tapestry of flavours, cultures, and stories unfolds, and the voices of renowned chefs, epicurean writers, and passionate food lovers add richness and depth to this narrative.

In this compilation of funny quotations about food, we embark on a captivating journey, exploring the profound insights and infectious enthusiasm that emanate from those who have delved into the world of culinary arts. These quotations delve into the artistry of culinary creation, the significance of sustainable and mindful eating, and the joy of gathering around a table to share a meal with loved ones.

quotations about food

"I'm not a vegetarian because I love animals. I'm a vegetarian because I hate plants." Anon

"I'm not saying I'm addicted to *caffeine*wine*garlic* but my blood type is now 'espresso." Anon

"I cook with wine, sometimes I even add it to the food." W. C. Fields (American humorist, 1880-1946)

"I am not a glutton – I am an explorer of food." Erma Bombeck (American humorist, 1927-96)

"I don't always know what I'm talking about but I know I'm talking about food." Chris Rock (American comedian, 1965-)

"My weaknesses have always been food and *men*alcohol*dieting* – in that order." Dolly Parton (American singer and songwriter, 1946-)

"A balanced diet is a cookie in each hand." Anon

"I'm at the age where food has taken the place of sex in my life. In fact, I've just had a mirror put over my kitchen table." Rodney Dangerfield (American comedian, 1921-2004)

"I will not eat *oysters.*beef.*snails.* I want my food dead – not sick, not wounded – dead." Woody Allen (American film director, writer, and actor, 1935-)

Mrs Thatcher: "Steak."
Waiter: "And the vegetables?"
Mrs Thatcher: "Oh, they'll have steak too." Anon

You do realise that *tinned food*corned beef*aspirin* is just for crack-heads and wars? Jesse Armstrong (British screenwriter, 1970-)

Frosties are just cornflakes for people who can't deal with *reality.*porridge.*sugar.* Jesse Armstrong (British screenwriter, 1970-)

There's no such thing as a little *garlic.*wine.*oregano.* Arthur Baer (American journalist, 1886-1969)

"A gourmet who thinks of calories is like a tart who looks at her watch." James Beard (American chef, 1903-85)

"A gourmet can tell from the flavour whether a woodcock's leg is the one on which the bird is accustomed to roost." Lucius Beebe (American writer, 1902-66)

I've always thought Alfred showed a marked lack of ingenuity over cakes – why didn't he cut off the burnt bits, and ice the rest? Madeline Bingham (English writer, 1912-1988)

I'm President of the United States, and I'm not going to eat any more *broccoli!*beef!*mushrooms!* George Bush (American Republican statesman, 1924-)

"If you are afraid of *butter*ghosts*milking cows* use cream." Julia Child (American cook, 1912-2004)

"Peanuts! What's happened to peanuts! Now every bugger's allergic to peanuts. It's true, you open a packet of peanuts now and a bunch of five year olds in a five-mile radius slam to the floor jabbing themselves with fucking adrenaline." Lee Evans (English comedian, 1964-)

It takes some skill to spoil a breakfast – even the English can't do it. J. K. Galbraith (Canadian-born American economist, 1908-2006)

"Donuts. Is there anything they can't do?" Homer Simpson by Matt Groening (American humorist and satirist, 1954-)

"Vegetarianism is harmless enough, though it is apt to fill a man with wind and self-righteousness." Robert Hutchinson (Scottish physician, 1871-1960)

"It has nothing to do with frogs' legs. No amphibian is harmed in the making of toad-in-the-hole." Nigella Lawson (British journalist and cookery writer, 1960-) to an American audience

"Isn't there any other part of the matzo you can eat?" Marilyn Monroe (American actress, 1926-62) on having matzo balls for the third time at Arthur Miller's parents' house

"I understand the big food companies are developing a tearless onion. I think they can do it – after all, they've already given us tasteless bread." Robert Orben (American comedy writer, 1927-)

Cheese. Shropshire Blue. It's so high in calorific content that you need only rub against it, and that's enough. Eric Pickles (British Conservative politician, 1952-) explaining why he is so large

Help Us Improve Funny Quotation (#FuQ)

  • Do you know a great quotation that belongs on this page?
  • Do you disagree with our top three?
  • Do you disagree with something else on this page?
  • Have we credited the wrong person with the quotation?

Find Us Quicker!

  • When using a search engine (e.g., Google, Bing), you will find us quicker if you add #FuQ to your search term.