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Funny Quotations about God

quotations about god

Welcome to the profound and spiritual realm of God, a concept that has been contemplated and revered by humanity for centuries. God represents the ultimate divine power, the source of creation, and the guiding force behind the universe. While different cultures and religions have diverse beliefs and interpretations of God, this concept often embodies qualities such as love, wisdom, and transcendence. In this compilation, we approach the topic of God with respect and a recognition of the deep reverence that it holds for many. While humour may be a part of our human experience, it is important to approach discussions about God with sensitivity and appreciation for the diversity of beliefs and perspectives.

In our quest to find humour in various aspects of life, we must tread carefully when it comes to discussions about God. While it can be challenging to find humorous quotations about such a profound and sacred subject, we acknowledge the potential for light-hearted observations on our human understanding of the divine. With that said, it is crucial to approach these quotes with respect and an understanding of the depth of religious and spiritual beliefs held by individuals worldwide. The intention of this compilation is to explore lighthearted and relatable moments within the realm of faith, while recognizing the need for sensitivity and open-mindedness.

"Trust in God. She will provide." Emmeline Pankhurst (English political activist, 1858-1928)

"If God did not exist, it would be necessary to invent Him." Voltaire (French philosopher, 1694-1778)

"God is not a cosmic bellboy for whom we can press a button to get things." Harry Emerson Fosdick (American pastor, 1878-1969)

"Nobody talks so constantly about God as those who insist that there is no God." Heywood Broun (American journalist, 1888-1939)

"God lends a helping hand to the man who tries hard." Aeschylus (Greek tragedian, circa 525-456 BC)

"If you talk to God, you are praying; if God talks to you, you have schizophrenia. If the dead talk to you, you are a spiritualist; if God talks to you, you are a schizophrenic." Thomas Szasz (Hungarian-born psychiatrist, 1920-2012)

"If it turns out that there is a God, I don't think that he's evil. But the worst that you can say about him is that basically he's an underachiever." Woody Allen (American film director, writer, and actor, 1935-)

"If only God would give me some clear sign! Like making a large deposit in my name at a Swiss bank." Woody Allen (American film director, writer, and actor, 1935-)

"God is silent. Now, if only we can get Man to shut up." Woody Allen (American film director, writer, and actor, 1935-)

"God is not dead but alive and working on a much less ambitious project." Anon

"If absolute power corrupts absolutely, where does that leave God?" Anon

"If I were Her, what would really piss me off the worst is that they cannot even get My gender right for Christ's sake." Roseanne Barr (actress, 1953-)

"I am prepared to meet my Maker. Whether my Maker is prepared for the great ordeal of meeting me is another matter." Winston Churchill (British Conservative statesman, 1874-1965)

"I've absolutely no idea if God exists. It seems unlikely to me, but, then, does a trout know that I exist?" Billy Connolly (Scottish comedian, 1942-)

"Do I believe in God? Let's say we have a working relationship." Noel Coward (English dramatist, actor, and composer, 1899-1973)

"Our only hope rests on the off-chance that God does exist." Alice Thomas Ellis (English novelist, 1932-2005)

"God will pardon me. It is His trade." Heinrich Heine (German poet, 1797-1856)

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